Maintenance

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Remember my beloved Volvo – Jean?

I’ve recently been performing some required maintenance on my car. You know, the battery dies & you replace it. Shoes (tires) wear out & I have to get new ones.  I live in Texas, in June & looking at 100+ degree heat waves.  My AC goes HOT &  I prefer not to arrive at my destinations looking (& smelling) like I just left the gym. Then…it’s the tune up required after 100k+ miles & probably brakes.  Because I’ve learned & teach sound financial principles, I purchased a used car that had all these points checked & approved prior to my purchase.  Of course, I’ve doubled the miles on it within the past 4 years, so…..it’s time.

I am frugal, economical, & even tight when it comes to these type things (OK…. most things!).  I shop around securing the best prices, request price matches, & order online as opposed to local parts places.

A friend asked a very normal question during a casual conversation discussing my maintenance investments.  “Why don’t you just trade your car in & get a new one?”  I say normal in the eyes of a society ridden with debt, stressed to the max & overwhelmed from one day to the next. I choose not to live that way!

ImageHer question was posed to my car, yet I couldn’t help but think how sad it is applied in relationships.  Being single for the past 20 years I’ve seen my share of disappointments in marriages, engagements & even friendships.  The “new car smell” has worn off & the “check engine light” is on requiring necessary, routine maintenance.  Wait!! Why pay for maintenance when you can trade in for a newer model!  Zero money down, free financing for a year, low-interest rates!    Newer models doesn’t necessarily refer to being age specific, but newer in experiences.  I immediately grieved for the marriages that are hanging in the balance right now.  Engagements being called off because he/she loved her/him, but doesn’t like her/him at all.  How many times do we see couples invest in their weddings without one fraction of investment afterwards in their marriage??  You see them too!  Many times a divorce is in process & the couple is mediating about who will pay for the credit card debt acquired because of an elaborate wedding.  Don’t get me wrong…..I love weddings, but have learned  I would now beg couples to invest in personal development, financial management & accountability instead.

There are many, many great *books available which will aid in answering questions & scenarios that are guaranteed to surface.  My ultimate reference is the Bible as it offers wisdom of the ages, timeless council & advice.  Invest in your relationships regardless of the stage & consider it the pre-loved inspection!  When maintenance is required, the resources are mapped out, emergency deposits were made &  you’ll never be left stranded!

Blessings,

g

*Not an exhaustive book list, but several of my absolute relationship favorites!–>>> Bible – God; 5 Love Languages, 5 Love Languages of Apology, & many other books by Gary Chapman; Wild At Heart – John Eldredge;  Men Are Like Waffles & Women Are Like Spaghetti Books – Bill & Pam Farrell;  His Needs/Her Needs- Willard Harley; Love & Respect and many other books by  Emerson Eggerichs; Intended For Pleasure – Wheat, Wheat & Rainey; The Anatomy of Peace – Arbinger Institute; Walking With God On A Road You Never Wanted To Travel and many other books by Pastor Mark Atteberry; Sexperiment – Ed & Lisa Young.

Buried–Parable of the Talents

There’s some things going on that I’d like to touch base with you about.  Have you ever gotten to a place in life where you’re not really bored, but feel a change is stirring?  I’ve learned to pay attention to these stirrings & entertain what they may entail.  During my years as a nurse, this generally meant I had to learn something involving new skills, areas of expertise or simply a change with the floor I worked on.  Each step brought me increase, not only financially, but in self-confidence & self-esteem.  However, these changes often required being uncomfortable or stepping outside of my comfort zone.  Later on I would mentor, precept & train others through the same processes with great intrinsic satisfaction.  I have a life motto– Never simply learn something for yourself, learn something well enough to teach it!!  Whether it takes devoting 10,000 hours or daily slight edge adjustments, do it!

Within the past few weeks I’m finding myself at the threshold of the familiar feelings.  Restless, indecisive, contemplative.  I admire John Maxwell & his wisdom & I’ve quoted him for years with this:

“People change when they hurt enough that they have to, learn enough that they want to, or receive enough that they are able to.” ~John Maxwell

I’m not sure what it takes for you to change, but any of those examples are amazing catalysts.  I’ve had a particular scripture resonate within my being to the point that I’m afraid I’ll miss the will of God if I miss changing.  Here it is:

Parable of the Talents

14“For it is just like a man about to go on a journey, who called his own slaves and entrusted his possessions to them.15“To one he gave five talents, to another, two, and to another, one, each according to his own ability; and he went on his journey.16“Immediately the one who had received the five talents went and traded with them, and gained five more talents.17“In the same manner the one who had received the two talents gained two more.18“But he who received the one talent went away, and dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.

19“Now after a long time the master of those slaves came and settled accounts with them.20“The one who had received the five talents came up and brought five more talents, saying, ‘Master, you entrusted five talents to me. See, I have gained five more talents.’21“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’

22“Also the one who had received the two talents came up and said, ‘Master, you entrusted two talents to me. See, I have gained two more talents.’23“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’

24“And the one also who had received the one talent came up and said, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow and gathering where you scattered no seed.25‘And I was afraid, and went away and hid your talent in the ground. See, you have what is yours.’

26“But his master answered and said to him, ‘You wicked, lazy slave, you knew that I reap where I did not sow and gather where I scattered no seed.27‘Then you ought to have put my money in the bank, and on my arrival I would have received my money back with interest.28‘Therefore take away the talent from him, and give it to the one who has the ten talents.’

29“For to everyone who has, more shall be given, and he will have an abundance; but from the one who does not have, even what he does have shall be taken away.30“Throw out the worthless slave into the outer darkness; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Worthless! Yikes!  I never want to be referred to as this! He admitted to being afraid & there are probably many more explanations as to why he buried the one talent.   I don’t want to bury what God has carefully orchestrated for me to gain knowledge of!  At this juncture I feel like example #2 in having learned enough to want change. This doesn’t mean I’ve arrived by any stretch of the imagination!  I’m ready to stretch my faith, stack new knowledge on wisdom & embrace the new.  Better still…….multiply the talents entrusted to me!

ImageWhat’s going on in your life?  Are you stuck?  Which of the catalysts for change is screaming your name? YOU  possess more talent than you probably care to admit.  Others could benefit by you exhibiting courage enough to step out & change!   One of my favorite men recently said, “I don’t mind getting stuck in traffic; don’t get stuck in life. – Bob Goff”

Bury the things worthy of forgetting & utterly leaving behind– excuses, self-sabotage, insecurities, fear, doubt, unbelief & others opinions.

Blessings,

g

Lessons Learned

Wow!  I’m so far behind in posts!  I have some notes saved to write, but I chose this to be the first!  In a world of best practices, advice, personal development, & etc., this pretty much sums up what I believe!  I respect this lady immensely!!

We could read & meditate on one daily & start over through the rest of the year!

Always remember lessons are invaluable, but your life is beyond even more that to someone!  YOU make a difference!

Blessings,

g

 

45 Life Lessons & 5 to Grow On by Regina Brett , a columnist for The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio.

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.

16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.

35. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.

36. Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.

41. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

42. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.

43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

45. The best is yet to come.

46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

48. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.

49. Yield.

50. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift..

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